Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
What would Jesus do? ... Jesus would slap a ho.
you were convinced that if all her tampons were gone her period would stop, so you started eating them.
i had a headache and asked the kid next to me for aspirin. he gave me esctacy instead. gotta love college.
I just told someone i was in "addition and subtraction 160".......and they believed me.
You were offering to spell people's name for a dollar.
The only funny part about this situation was this morning when they rounded up all the drunks in the ER, piled us into a minivan, then dropped us all off at our houses.
It was a legit night tell he threw a snowball in the bar, thats when I knew it was time to go to the next bar.
I am sleeping in the bathtub because my bed is too soft.
So yeah he had good weed?
Question #1: Why am I on my living room floor? Question #2: Where did the bloody footprints come from? Question #3: Why are there two McChickens next to the wine bottle?
Woke up in a sombrero and a males speedo. Tequila makes normal peoples clothes fall off, however it makes me fall into a questionable identity crisis
Well she just asked a sorority girl if she should fuck her floor mate so it's basically like the blind leading the blind
i refuse to sex anyone who doesn't get my lord of the rings references. no exceptions.
Also, we can't be seen together looking suspicious or sexually satisfied
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