I thought at least he would want to exchange numbers after he tried to put it in my bum
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
I don't know what happened to get you in this mentality. This time last year your were ass up on a hotel bathroom counter getting licked by a stranger.
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
She's "threw gas on the fire to put it out" drunk. Come retrieve ur gf. Ps she smells like burnt hair
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
I AM OVERLY HIGH AND OVERLY AWARE OF MY TONGUE IN MY MOUTH
you 2 were alone in the living room and the dog walked in and you started yelling what are all these people doing in here
I don't want a baby! I JUST WANT AN ORGASM THAT ISN'T SELF INFLICTED.
why can't I meet attractive men at the places I like to hang out? like books a million. or the liquor store.
Duuuuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fruuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fuuuck
I couldn't read the menu. I ordered the first thing I was able to read. Don't think I ate anything. Left $20 on the table.
FACT: You were laying down on top the bar letting randoms do bodyshots off you until someone told theyre friend "its time to roll, i wanna hit another bar" and you literally rolled your self right off the bar. have fun explaining your bruises tomorrow
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
Didn't know my clit could produce that many orgasms in one night. Fuck my husband; think I might have to become a lesbian.
Randomize
