grinding to god bless the USA? really?
shut up
I don't believe in a God but I'm almost positive I just shit out the devil.
That guy over there looks like a cartoon/action figure.
omg, i know.
we're too high.
My brain says no but my pants say off.
Jake was my 1st thought but I seriously thought u already did him... & then there's the getting the clap story... so I settled on Ben for my guess.
I have done Jake, not Ben. But this was fresh meat. And P.S. it was ghonnerea.
Ahh, yes. It's apparently too early in the morning to keep your partners and their std's straight.
Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
so he tried to quietly tell me my Tampon String was hanging out in front of his family but i didn't hear him so he yelled it
it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
He's doing the single life. He recently finished like a 3 year relationship. You can't date him.
But I don't want to date him. I just want to look at him. Naked. And in my bed.
They asked if I wanted to shotgun a beer and before i could ask who had a knife they all had bit holes into the cans. Im never leaving Germany!
That girl next to you randomly said that she fits into a queen sized pillow case
WTF.
All three shower stalls were filled with couples fucking and then someone yelled "switch" and... We switched
Pretty sure I was high. I thought there was music coming out of my makeup bag.
She just left someone a voicemail saying 'you better not have plans Saturday night, cause I'm going to sit on your face.'
Randomize