there are 10 yearolds here who keep calling me on the elbow rule!
Wait are they playing beer pong to?
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
One last question would your parents let me sleep in your bathtub for the night?
Night. I'll wake u up at 6 with the unfinnished vodka bottle so be prepared young grasshoper. U have much to learn.
No more fucking baseball tools. Walk-of-shamed home in only a pinstriped jersey and a Red Sox SnapBack.
Our fuck buddy relationship took a turn for the worst after we were drunk and I punched him in the face when he asked for a three some with my best friend.
You are a booty call, not a friend.
Witnessing a crazy lady on the bus screaming about how romney is one of the four horsemen of the apocalypse.
My mom just told me my dad shaves his pubes while drunk and I don't know how to feel anymore.
I feel like you're the reason public nudity is illegal and generally frowned upon in society
Seriously considering modifying my computer case so it can dispense wine. I need to make a bunch of changes and reorganize it's guts anyway....
Trump won PA by a fucking landslide. If only Cruz hadn't eaten that booger.
It's going to turn into you and me throwing down in a devastating lip-synch battle while everyone else stands around awkwardly.
woke up and you werent here...its ok if we're never going to speak again but my furry hand cuffs are missing and i would like them back. thanks.
My brain is a dvd screensaver and I'm allowed to have a good thought when it hits the corner
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