Dude.. I don’t care how hairy she is, you already left me at the bar, and now I have to find another fucking way home... NOW BE A MAN ABOUT IT!
i mean, i stole her boyfriend and beat her snake score on facebook within 48 hours. not her week.
its sad that I know 23 beers will fit into my purse
She gave me a foot massage while her friend rode me. Your gf puked into the oscolating fan. How were our nites alike?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This election needs to be over, im tired of girls asking who im going to vote for mid hookup
do u know what happened to the bottles last night?
apparently we hid them.... i google mapped the location into my phone
I might have been the first person to be rolling balls at a referee seminar
Please tell me there is not a bookmark on your browser with the title "Christmas Porn"
Holy high batman
The hairdryer was like a fuckin obstacle course
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
As soon as I got there, you appeared out of no where, yelled "they're giving away free cigarettes!" in my face and then disappeared and I didn't see you the rest of the night.
Last night I was introduced as the Picasso of getting fucked up so I obviously had to live up to it by chugging long islands
So I got this new job… ever been fucked in a corner office before?
After we had sex he began to tell me the craziest places he's had sex. He told me KFC bathroom so I rolled over and went to sleep.
We both know we're cheating on one another. But our side pieces aren't as kinky as us...so yeah, we're still together. This is a fucked up relationship.
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