Well all I remember is going to sleep being big spoon to you and waking up being little spoon to *****
I JUST GOT MY PERIOD AND MY VISA FOR LONDON GOT APPROVED! BEST DAY EVER!
He was sitting cross legged outside his tent repeatedly hitting the ground with a hammer and shouting 'this.is.a.good.idea.'
he woke up with $200 in his pocket and had to buy his cell phone back from a hobo at the bus stop.
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What would you do if you came home and i was in nothing but the table cloth?
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
If you've never been partying there before, take Shae with you. Drunk Shae is like a GPS. She found us the only bottle shop still open at four, a pot dealer, and told us all which subway to take to get home. She'd never been to Madrid before. It was awesome.
Omg this is like trying to sleep on a pile of ballsacks.
It's after midnight. I didn't find the answer to my problem, but I did find the bottom of a bottle of vodka, so... there's that.
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friends are allowed to bang on New Years, I read it on the Internet somewhere.
She's like the sister I never had that I want to bang.
Sometimes I look at her and just start choking. She is that much of an evil entity.
Speaking of lightening speed, he ate me out while I was watching The Flash. If that's not winning at life idk what is
So my balls are accidently making an appearance on snapchat
tonight...tonight im having sex in honor of you
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