have you facebook stalked him yet?
No, I don’t know his last name...
Just google his license plate numb
halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
Oh you know, watching its always sunny and petting his cat and NOT fucking. I'm starting my whorefree 2012 resolution early.
I basically have a picture with a half naked foreign exchange student. He kept screaming rolltide and i felt like a traitor
Someone please drive out to my house to bring me a beer.. There are some in the fridge but I just can't get up
Ice that vagina down, get some coffee, and try not to walk with a limp. It's time to dominate, pull it together
PLEASE. I won't throw up on the floor this time. Or fuck in the bathroom. Or dance on the pool table. So PLEASE.
Oh you know..Chillin with your dad.
With a fannypack full of drugs.
She licked my face when I was on the phone with a customer and I just laughed. Im not sure if thats good or bad
She has "Massive Shits" listed as a turn off. That's very specific and there's a story behind it I bet.
Sweet, got a date tomorrow night
Also, I've finally come to the point in the relationship when having sex with socks on is ok.
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
We were sexting and i didn't know what to say, so i said i wanted to wrap him in tortillas and devour him like a burrito. then i went on by saying that i liked my burritos with a lot of cheese.
My room looks so cute. Who wouldn't want to hook up with me in here?
I have had my dick inside of entirely too many people at this wedding in order for me to be the groom. Please give me a swift kick in the dick to wake me up from this nightmare
Randomize
