one word: firstdatebathroomanal
do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
I'm still reeling over the fact that you beat us all at Risk while you were flat on your ass drunk and falling asleep on South America.
I noticed when you had too much when you were yelling "HOE-HAVE-A-SEAT" to his cat.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
then he asked me if i wanted to "handle his wingman"
Apparently you get kicked out of gay bars if they catch you putting the entire free condom bowl in your purse.
I'm not drinking anymore...and by that, I mean until St. Patrick's Day.
Then, halfway through our conversation, I remembered what you drunkenly told me last night and was all "maintain eye contact, do not look at his massive penis".
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The last thing I remember was wearing a sombrero and trying to do cartwheels in the club
You did one successfully. Then smashed into the wall
Stop touching yourself.
Wtf!?!?!?! Did you install a camera???
I think he just tried to put your boyfriend in a trashcan....
WHAT KIND OF DEALER ONLY WORKS FRI-SUN???
Ours, apparently.
we were all too drunk to realize that the cat wasnt yours
You ever stub your boner? It happened to me. Just know that drugs and strip poker and a hot tub. I'll Regale you with the story over drinks later.
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