Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
i might have gotten away with it if "don't tase me bro!" wasn't the first thing i said when i rolled down my window.
God Help those hot young girls. It's going to be like Bambi in iraq. Except worse.
he had his head down and said he was listening for the buffalo, he had to still be drunk.
we just saw you getting yelled at by the cops for trying to 'hijack' a street sweeper...how have you not been arrested yet?
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
Will you please bring me a line of coke at work without asking questions?
Lost my virginity in a banana suit. Glad I waited.
I concluded last night that you have no tear ducts, heart, or sense of any feeling.
My way of showing team usa support, bronze: handy silver: bj gold: home run. God, I'm patriotic
You should photoshop their heads on tigers first!!
For my parents' annivery card? How high are you?
He didn't get laid that weekend.. and that is honestly an accomplishment for the rest of us.
There's no winning that game with me. It's either "Can I walk home at the end of the night," or "am I throwing up trying to sleep in the front yard." Rules are irrelevant.
Doing 9 month old dishes in my bath tub. These dishes literally had enough time to gestate a human child
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
Randomize
