Your brother just successfully got half the bar mostly naked
I'm glad you talked me out of that flying penis tattoo.
Katy Perry is on a Proactiv commercial. That "I kissed a girl" shit is so much less hot now.
Im in your car brotha dog. Its was unlocked, so im gonna sleep in it. well i mean i think its your car be your car.
i shit in a pringles can and hid it somewhere in your house....happy hunting
I just wanna lay in my bed all bundled up as have someone feed me lettuce
Dad says your scarf isnt fooling anyone and u look like a douchebag, its literally the perfect time to tell him your gay
Unless your apartment has 3 am pancakes Im not coming over.
Are you ok?
They gave me a cat until I fall asleep. His name is fluffy because he's fluffy.
If I die, sorry about rent.
This is seriously fucking awkward. My favorite sex scene just started and my dad's still here. He offered me Cheetos.
Road head absolutely translates. That's the beauty of road head... It's so portable!
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
That's true. Ask me when I'm not fucked up. Nvm hold on. Btw. Wikipedia dinosaur. It's fascinating
Got any extra dick over there? I’m running low
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