Do you think "I had sex with my co-worker last night I don't think I can come in today" is a good excuse?
Why would you say my penis is small in front of so many people?
half the nation just spent an hour watching a balloon fly around. we are officially the dumbest fucking country.
I just found all of my Mary-Kate and Ashley movies. Can you say drinking game?
spending the week with her family was quite possibly the longest ive ever gone without having a boner
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
SURVIVED FINALS. CAN'T DIE FROM ALCOHOL POISONING. NOTHER SHOT. CAPS.
I think theres a high possibility i could be flammable.
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
Brandon's Recipe: two parts cocoa, one part sugar, one part milk, two parts four, 378 parts paranoia. Thanks for the fucking brownies, bitch.
I no longer believe that the road to self esteem is through his penis.
My vagina was just really confused why you weren't inside it
i made the walk of shame wearing her booty shorts that said juicy on the back. i'm still counting it as a good night
That's too much drama for once a month dick... that's in-house dick drama only
Just had the biggest masturbatory crisis ever.
What does that mean?
Internet is down.
Randomize
