just got my tax refund and at bell. how do you say i want a grand worth of 5 layer burritos in spanish?
I want you to come here and listen to her climax and then tell me how funny you think it is.
This went bad. Everyone is crying, i dont know why and I am really uncomfortable.
No room in fridge, chilling wine in snow. Do NOT let the dog pee on it.
I told her she can't come to our bonfire because she throws up on herself & she has a mustache. And now apparently I'm a bitch or something.
I don't know which is worse, the fact that he can say will you fuck me in so many languages or that I'm turned on because of that
Maybe I'm just didn't notice and imagined a different penis as a Freudian coping mechanism?
Somebody really needs to come home and pick up the used condom from the middle of the wood room floor. It's blue, if that helps decide who comes - uh, home.
we def had a heart to heart that turned into a BJ last night
I'm the only person I know who could have actual sex and then dream about my vibrator.
On my way to return shoes I bought so that I can afford to buy a pregnancy test. Is this adulthood?
I'm kind of pissed I'm not hungover, that means I could have totally drank more last night.
Is it a bad thing when vodka doesn't taste like vodka anymore?
I might have to quit marching band. It's affecting my drinking schedule
Gonna do a few lines then clean my room so I can feel like my life is somewhat in order.
Randomize
