He asked me to sit on his face, but i didnt, for 2 reasons, one, i had just pooped like 20 mins before sex, and two, this could be my future husband. so i skipped on sitting.
so, just learned that EVERYONE heard pretty much everything last night. my roommates were surprised to learn you're a dirty talker.
I'm not to broken up about it. Our relationship was worse than a coldplay song.
I can no longer count the number of girls I've banged on my fingers and toes. It's like being born again.
so i made out with some dude last night at the bar. and some girl just stood there and watched. i felt bad so i made out with her too. She looked like she felt left out.
I was sitting on the floor of CVS chugging white grape juice until someone asked me to leave.
The chick who threw the party was all pissed cause she thought I made out with her boyfriend. Admittedly, I did, but she was throwing up and crying at the time so she really can't be that mad.
I was scared that I should know him but I was too busy blacking out to remember
fuck you and your stupid hot as hell face
I AM NOT LOSING TO SOME FICTIONAL CROSSDRESSER
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
So help me God.... if he sends me a dick pic.... I will make it so he has to eat food through a tube in his nose and poop into a bag by his belly button
I feel like it's the kind of place that would appriciate my Aladdin vest
Dude I love you. So much. Thank u. I'm safea. In allysi lns car. Mine towed. If u loved me ud leand me 500 in the morning. Sleep on it nd let me know.
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
Randomize
