sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
tonight's goal was "most regrettable decision" and you bring wine coolers?
she was puking into the toilet drowning herself saying "its okay im a swimmer"
Does she usually listen to trance and cut up broccoli when she's high?
It's been decided..lingerie is an investment. You get free breakfast and cab rides out of it.
Don't lose. A little bit of my soul dies every time a beer pong game is lost.
He told her hed rather go bobbing for apples in puke than have sex with her.
All I vaguely remember from last night is getting up on that nice mahogany table and debating about squirrel's rights
The joke is on me because whale penis is forever in my search history.
Worth it.
I ordered more beers for everyone but had to finish them all. I promptly went outside and projectile vomited in the street. Three times.
It's a good thing he's hot, because it seemed like he was trying to do CPR on my private parts
Currently on my Sunday walk of shame. Should I go to church?
Bro, she said she wanteo to fuck me with my white Nike cap on so I resemble a douchebag. I think my choice of women might be coming into question
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
Magyver!
Dude whoeverrs house this is has only creeam cheese and beer in the fridge. Thats my kinda diet
Randomize
