can your parents tell?
i just had a cookie in one hand and a phone in the other and tried to eat my phone...they know
Drunk on Tuesday. Double fisting. Mmmbop is playing. Only girl in the group. Life is complete.
he was once again the drunkest girl at the party
Also he wants to know a casual, consise way to ask a girl in a bar if he could eat her out. Think on that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why is there a muffler in the livingroom?
First, I just want to say that I had nothing to do with it. Second, how good is your car insurance?
That awkward moment when the dude you blew on camera in college friend requests you on Facebook.
Who is this?!????
That awkward moment when you think you're texting a friend the above statement, but instead you text a stranger.
wow thanks for pushing me towards an older man
you gotta start somewhere if you're going to be a trophy wife
There is a 97.5% chance that my sketchy roommate is also a hooker.
So when can I meet her?
IM AT A ROOFTOP FUNDRAISER LOOKING OVER THE WHITE HOUSE I WILL NOT RUIN MYSELF
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Burritos, beer, and hot tub sex. Merry Christmas to me.
I have fence marks all over my body
So, I'm either with my future life partner or my future life taker. And his brother. lol. I'll let you know when I get home alive.
he told me that he only likes small dogs. I should have known he was going to end up being little bitch.
My idiot ex texted me on Valentine's day to tell me I was right, he did need a therapist.
Sorry. We had to leave because I knocked a guy out for saying "yolo".
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