what are you wearing?
Just my guilt
That girl would be great looking if she lost 1000 pounds and cut off her head.
Dude, this old lady messaged me on Facebook talking about her grandson and wanted to know shit about me. I'd almost call her a cougar except she looks like mashed potatoes that have come alive.
I didn't think it was possible for the human body to be physically dependant on weed until I moved in with this kid
i just lost my virginity over my 3 hour lunch break..
u hav a 3 hour lunch break?!
i like how the length of my lunch break is the thing that phases u
He told me he wanted to break up so he could get "closer to God."
Does God suck his dick?
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
I don't know what you drank last night but you really enjoyed the 4 egg body shots.
Just picked up an ounce of keif and if it goes to waste before the world ends I'm gonna haunt the shit out of somebody when we all die.
I fell into his fridge. I want to leave.
I'm at the point where I'm gonna write in my mothers bday card. Happy birthday. Please stop having sex with the door open.
Haha. Maybe he's one of those feminine men who fucks like a god then makes you fantastic crepes afterwards
he asked me where I was going to school, and then we started having sex, and I answered his question forty five minutes later after we were done. It was the chilliest thing ever.
woke up. showered n got ready. had sex. and was still 15 minutes early to work... its gonna be a good day!
Hey do you remember me?
You were the giant banana I had sex with... how could i forget?
Randomize
