im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
the bartender cut u off when u asked him for his screename so u could IM him later
I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
He has until sunday, then my legs are officially closed to him
My roommate says its rare that you can be tear gassed before you lose your virginity so i feel accomplished in life
This is God's way of telling me He loves me and wants me to be a cocktease.
Go forth my daughter and give blue balls to all who may gaze upon your tits.
YES please come visit. Lets go get belligerent. I won't even pepperspray you
A dude just looked at me like my drunk swaying was corrupting his progeny DUDE YOUR KID HAS A MULLET YOU'VE ALREADY RUINED HIM
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
If you saw or spoke to me yesterday can you message me. Trying to make a timeline of the day I was too drunk to remember
YOUR VAGINA IS SO CUTE IT'S LIKE A LITTLE MACAROON
Dude, naked camping ALWAYS takes precedence. I would skip my own funeral to go naked camping.
we should most definitely have a fire extinguisher in the apartment. like... for sure
And despite my lack of successful relationships I'm a fucking guru
That's like claiming you're a good coach but going 2-12 last season
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
Randomize
