I'm at a Mexican Walmart. Wish you were here.
did the walk of shame from ex-boyfriend's room only to find other ex-boyfriend sitting in the living room. some people shouldn't be allowed to be friends.
some people shouldn't be allowed to be desperate.
There's just this way he looks at me that makes me want to suck his soul out through his dick.
i knew she was high when she broke up the cookies into her glass of milk and ate it like cereal
just hooked up with an air force officer in a hotel room paid for by the military. i feel like i should go around thanking taxpayers for the assist.
I don't know what's worse, the fact that my parents own a sex swing or the fact that my little cousin was playing on it
I don't think my prof knows we've noticed her No Bra Fridays.
Really?!? Does he think blocking me on FACEBOOK means that he doesn't have a kid with me?!
Today's forecast is horny with strong chance of booty calls. Low of Craigslist cruising, and a high of climaxing in a stranger's bed.
Would it be weird to jack off in the hospital?
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
I should probably drink beer instead of rum today so I don't end up naked in my living room while I still have guest.
So I'll be starting a scrapbook from all the mugshots of the guys I've slept with
Why would you ask him if you could lick his chest?
He has a very lickable chest
I’m going to lick a fucking door knob when this shit is all over
Probably Waffle House
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