What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
sometimes i wish i was the girl in a porno. that way if i couldn't get any, i'd just order a pizza and do him.
Don't put random dicks in your mouth or any other crevice for that matter... and i'm home in 30 seconds
Wish I got that text last night instead of this morning.
whatever it's my dick and i'll put it wherever i want
Frozen waffles and wine. Loneliness-party of one
8===D
That's the bat signal to come over and fuck me.
You should have heard my farts after he left. I swear one of them was a demonic voice saying, "It's coming for you, Nicole. It's coming,".
My butthole probably tastes like a Cinnabon right now
GO RIDE HIS EYEBROWS INTO THE SUNSET
He came and farted at the same time. My life is over.
I would be down to associate sex w taco bell
i spent my Thursday drinking before noon and not wearing pants
im in DESPERATE NEED OF A COMPANION RIGHT NOW I’M MOTHER FUCKING TRIPPING SOLID GOLD BALLS
Now that I'm sober I feel the need to tell you that I'm not really a fish whisperer....
Dude my cat is eating sugar cookies with me. No joke. My cat likes cookies.
Randomize