i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
i thought i was the drunkest one there til some girl puked in the tip jar.
Is it a bad thing I remember to take my birth control when I stumble across guys I've had sex with on facebook?
She didn't even ask about the dinosaur pinata in my trunk. Like at this point I think these are the things she expects from me
So squirting runs in the family.
You did a line of free coke with an obese Slovenian unlicensed cab driver in the toilets of the most questionable strip club in the country. New low man.
When you put it like that, I'm inclined to agree.
I THINK I JUST JOINED A GANG. PLEASE PICK ME UP.
I took shrooms last night.. For a good half hour I genuinely believed I was black and being held captive by a leaf. Never again.
True enough. Do you ever think that these girls grandparents ghosts are watching you masterbate to their granddaughters and look at you in Shame?
I can only use one eye at a time. And if I want to listen, I have to close both of them.
Halloween is the end of the singles holidays they don't start again until st. Patrick's day we better get wifed up or it's going to be a long winter lol
I'm not a whore anymore. I gave up 90% of my women for you. I'm a 4-5 woman kind of guy now.
Just had someone from Hells Angels snort coke off my tits...so I'm pretty much done with life now. 💀
I'd call the fact I ended up in my own bed a huge success
Randomize