she's basically destroyed all of the faith i had that skinny blond girls could be a functioning part of society.
I was just about to go down on her when she gave herself a "smell check" and said "no, not today".
Telling me its the beginning of school is like telling me the crown royal fairy has come back from vacation.
because you can't take the autistic girl you're babysitting on a blunt ride.
I bought a 9 dollar purse from payless so if I throw up in it tomorrow, no biggie.
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
Dude I was taking a shower and I kept looking down at the drain expecting Mario to come up, yell "It's a me, Mario!", tickle my balls, and go back down the drain.
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
How's my date look?
Like a retarded elf
In a good way
8===D
That's the bat signal to come over and fuck me.
Again??? Now we can't ever fucking go there again STOP PEEING IN FOYERS
Him naked in my bed with a bottle of vodka in one hand, a pipe in the other, and a rose in his mouth.
If she "comes out" to me I guess I'll high five her. That's pretty much my response to everything these days.
Only great wives bring your dope to you when you are at the Cardiologist
I don't know, all I remember is waking up at 4 in the morning to him going down on me.
Randomize
