no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
Playing drinking games to Nancy Grace totally counts as "keeping up with current events.."
Bars not open yet, I feel like a desperate alcoholic wandering around outside.
We glued Jenga blocks together, called it "magic blocks" and sold it to the stoners for $50 and a bottle of Henny
i dont care how hungover you are, go back to the frat house and get him. HE IS 11.
he just sent me a picture of his penis sticking through a piece of paper that he had drawn a stick figure with tits on it that said "you"
Where are you? I hear fireworks and you've gone missing. I'm sure that is not coincidence.
By getting lucky do you mean I get one of your incredible BJs or you not killing me by the end of dinner?
People were staring and acting all judgmental and offended... Like they've never seen anyone breastfeed in a liquor store.
I'm taking a shit break of discontent as a personal protest
I just googled "creative ways to tell someone you'll give them a blow job". I'm losing my touch.
Hope everything goes ok. If it makes you feel better, I straightened vomit into my hair and killed a bird earlier.
I can't tell if my heart is fluttering because I love him... or if it's palpitating from all the coke.
Turns out my mom didn't really want to know I was in a new dimension last night from smoking so much.
right after that u started calling me g-force and started trying to bellyslide down his drive way
Randomize
