if you dont talk to me in person you cant text me
wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
time to smoke my breakfast
I just snorted a line of adderall through a rolled up business card for the Michigan Law Admissions Office.... Tell me I'm not motivated
somehow writing 'not a skank' on yur boobs doesn't really make you look less skanky...
She just said she wanted to get freaky and left the room. I'm almost certain I just heard the microwave.
Drank another frat president under the table. Thinking of starting my own, gonna call it Alpha Phi Alcoholics
some drunk guy just paid $3 for each cig that i picked up off the ground. the cigs that he threw on the ground. I might just follow him the rest of the night
He tipped the stripper with quarters. After that not even the waitress would talk to us. I had to move to another table to get a lapdance
I'm trying to have a "pick me up from my house so I can get completely annihilated night" any takers? Cmon people this is what friends are for
In his defense he just bought a bong like a week ago so he's still in that honeymoon phase.
do you know where my other puke covered boot is
Sometimes you just gotta get high and go to a planetarium. Why can't he understand that?
I wrote life affirmations on my notes to repeat and read several times a day so I become a better person, see the time on the toilet has been constructive
Randomize
