I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
He sent me a video of himself jacking off. I am not kidding.
WTF??? Isn't he married??
Yeah but his wife is at a birthday party and I guess he's bored. LOL
That would explain his violent outburst while watching barefoot contessa...
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Plus my stomach has been speaking through my ass all day sending notes saying "fuck you" and "this is from your liver" or "i will kill you."
work has become about six times more interesting since i started fucking my boss.
Now that I'm born again, I'm preserving my gift.
Your vagina isn't a White Elephant gift. You can't re-wrap it after it's already been given several times. That's white trash thinking.
She was grinding on him and then she was eating a Big Mac. Who the hell brings a Big Mac to the club?
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
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That's the fall semester you first snorted drugs off my ass I think
I just got caught impersonating a t-Rex by my boss. Sadly he wasn't fazed by my behavior and acted like it was normal.
my human sexuality class is the only class where the porn i watch the night before is relevant to the discussion the next day
she opened a can of olives, drained the juice and poured ranch dressing in. oh and 'croutons' (saltines) on top...
we played his NES Classic. Turns out there is a warp zone to my vagina.
he went down on me and a few minutes later he asked to show me a magic trick. then he pulled a quarter out of my vagina
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