I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
I just rolled a joint with a page from On The Road by Kerouac. I have never felt like more of a hipster.
i cant remember past the part when we filled his tub with skittles.
I feel like if you stuck me in a room with all my old toys it'd be the best high ever.
she went apple picking. why dont we do cute things like that? let's go to a pumpkin patch!
because we're not cute. we're sluts. and sluts don't go apple picking.
you know it's the perfect hook up when you don't have any friends in common with his girlfriend on facebook.
I just had a flash of me drinking straight vodka out of a condom...
I'm that hungover student in class ... On a wednesday morning
Omg I think I'm in the wrong class
Remember when we had a keg, and then another 5 cases... and like 30 people drank it all?
Everything hurts.
It's my vagina- remember its magical and yes I just did mini spirit fingers
Sometimes i think i need to stop drinking because i can't afford losing so many panties anymore
I wish I could say this wasn't the first time I shit myself in a Piggly Wiggly.
He came into my room last night and started peeing underneath my desk, I told him the bathroom was the next door over.
The last time I was on vacation the pandemic blew up. Can't wait to see how my vacation fucks up the world this time.
Let the record show that I hate your ass.
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