So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
I had a dream last night that I had to pretend I liked Dave Matthews Band to impress this girl I was talking to.
I guess it was more of a nightmare.
Ever since I discovered that youporn works on blackberry, my brickbreaker skills have gone to shit
for me the strap perfect is like a chastity belt
I took the precaution of putting my macbook the one place in the dorm there is no way i can piss on it... the toilet
Someone just told me I could double date with them and their dog as my date. This is why the suicide rates are so high at the holidays.
Is this one of those "if you didnt give such good head we couldn't be friends" moments?
i was giving head the other day and thought of your all penis tastes the same quote and couldnt stop laughing
It's like everything I need in life within a five block radius: booze, toilets, dogs, dicks.
I literally stopped banging her when my ESPN app alerted me that the Spurs had won. That's how much I hate Lebron. I would rather watch him cry in the post game interviews than get it in
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
I'll be honest, this year's Vegas trip will be nothing short of disappointing if there's no repeat of the angry ménage a trios in a closet.
Interesting fact: if you wanted to rename a guy Jeff, just tell him you only fuck Jeffs. Magically whatever name he was using is actually his middle name cause he doesn't like going by Jeff.
I think I just scared the sex out of my booty call. He saw me at the grocery store using one of those "future mother" parking spots right next to the handicap ones. He just made eye contact and drove off. I regret my laziness.
I pointed at him and said “there goes mr fuckwad”
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