He came in the heat vent in my car. Don't ask how it happened.
Do you have a shampoo for semen
Or a time machine
Just cleaned up my puke with my lecture notes.
one of the cashiers from Kroger is eating at my kitchen table and nobody knows why.
A good ear swabbing is more orgasmic than sex with him
He made me a "booty call of the year" award.
at one point he was caressing me in the kitchen asking me my name over and over again and then asking what my favorite continent was
Btw after this weekend the chipndales costume has a 125% success rate.
I can only take thier stupid "I think beauty school is for me" routine so long until I have to bitch slap them with some knowledge
Blow job season was short but glorious.
That's probably when I climbed a tree and told everyone I was an ornament
My diet has been 80% Fun Dip this week, soooo, no. Not good.
Just remember that no one else gets to suck his dick but you, feel honored. It's like the Olympic torch of life is being passed off to you and it's your time to run
mcfuck me up
MCFUCK ME UP INSIDE
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
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