just saw someone puke all over a michigan fan. he didn't even flinch.
You know that it's no longer pregaming if you don't go anywhere, right? That's just drinking alone.
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
Just found my mom passed out in my bed holding a bag of wine. Not sure if I'm ashamed or proud.
This girl would not stay down. It was like night of the living dead. She kept on rising up to haunt anything with a penis
just cuz theres a goalie doesnt mean i cant commandeer the goal and become a way better goalie
i refuse to be around anyone not wearing a sombrero...its cinco de mayo
A gay dude just spanked me with a nicholas sparks novel and called me foxy. I'm putting this on my resume.
While we were having sex he asked me if I wanted to get wingstop after. I think I found my future husband.
I got a snap of someone jumping off a light pole. Was that you? Please confirm or deny. #onWisconsin
The main motivators in my life are my sex drive and spite
Did he hurt you? I have a crowbar I can beat his sorry ass with
I woke up to an email from expedia confirming my flight to hong kong
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
He's got a big dick, a steady job and tells me I'm pretty. There is litterally nothing else I look for I a guy.
Randomize
