Call me when you're up
Great dream, you were in it
Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
Tell me why I go to the dollar store for nail polish remover and a ghetto black dude trys to hit on me in the parking lot, then he gets in line behind me with a dousche bag literally and that is his only purchase.
Thats about the time I should have known you would run around naked and try to make out with my sleeping mother
do you ever lay in the bath and watch the blood hit the water?
EWW. Don't discuss your period with me. You can go shave your back now.
I literally just saw a campus policeman riding a Segway pull over a moving car. you should just give up.
Your TV has the DVD menu for White Chicks permanently burned into the screen. I can't anymore. That's just a whole different level that I cannot comprehend.
He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
He's so gross, but the preschooler inside me is screaming that this is her life dream and I have to be with him or she'll never forgive me.
it would be a downgrade if your vagina tasted like skittles
Old woman told me I looked like her son and then she started explaining to me how she wanted me to fuck her
I'd like to believe that in some alternate universe we are living this wonderful lesbian life together..
I just have to point out that once I typed "fa" my phone filled in "fatass"
Life without a bra equals bliss.
I think I might start referring to your vagina as a separate being now
Randomize
