I just left the house and 2 chicks are in the kitchen making breakfast. Might want to get up.
I'm up, no shirt, and staring at a breakfast casserole. Who are these girls?
Theres just something about looking at pictures of your dick in church that doesn't feel right
Chasing a shot of svedka with a clementine is NOT the same as tequila w lime...
One is full of apple juice. One is full of tequila. This is real russian roulette my friend.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This hot topless Jamaican just ran down the st with me on his back and He was screaming "I be stealing yo white ladies."
I don't know if i should be jealous or worried... or question where you are.
Oh man. Realized I was high when I realized how long I'd been watching Roseanne
I thought it was a myth but I have just reached the age of sitting on my balls. Not a fan.
Just woke up from a weed coma and found a stem in my bra. Rainy day success.
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She pretty much spent NYE measuring dicks, trying to decide which one to take home.
just yelled CURVEBALL at my nightie because it turned out to be a pair of shorts
It's one am and you're asking me if you should buy a plane ticket for a booty call.
the guy working the counter at the liquor store noticed i got my haircut and said it was pretty.....
There's a bull to ride and dancing on the bar is encouraged. This is my heaven. And this is why god made leopard tube tops.
OH MY GOD I AM DYING. AS I WAS TEXTING I JUST BUMPED INTO A MOTHER FUCKING DEER. I AM SHAKING
Wait...Literally? You hit a deer...with your body?!
I PHYSICALLY RAN INTO IT. I FELT ITS WEIRD HAIR AND I EVEN APOLOGIZED CAUSE IT DINDT REGISTER THAT IT WASNT A PERSON. MORTIFIED.
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