So I walked out of my room and there was my brother....standing naked
I wish you were here to vomit in your hand.
Just found a glow stick inside of my vagina..
With the amount of traffic your vagina gets, it was only a matter of time before someone threw a rave there.
you just used "cock block" and "youth group" in the same sentence. somethings wrong with you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My T9 text prediction thing keeps predicting every next word is going to be "midgets".
Definitely contact high. Thirty miles an hour listening too i can see clearly now wanting too eat the steering wheel
I'm glad we are bonding over both contracting clamidya. Winners.
100%
Do you know how to give stiches?
I do not...this text concerns me
Well I can't message him and be like "hey I was behind you in CVS a month ago and I remembered your last name and DOB and looked you up on fb and added you so wanna hang out"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was everywhere. My dick was a sprinkler of lost future children.
Trying to put a fitted sheet on drunk is one of the boss levels of slutty adulthood.
She doesn't even give a fuck about angle. I seriously gotta start doing like penis yoga or something.
The dude we met that gave us weed sent me a video of his balls covering the sun like a solar eclipse
Who did he bring home?
Idk. But did you see her shoe choice by the stairs, I'm really not expecting anything great.
No one can touch me, I'm made of fruit.
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