do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
I think the best way to start out any day is to watch 80's music videos. It's like visual wheaties.
nothing says happy new years better than a black eye from shooting yourself with a champagne bottle
I still think it's messed up that you're naming your kids after all the guys you slept with in college
Hooked up with an Aussie chick last night only an Indonesian chick away from completing my lap around the pacific rim
Everything is fine now . The coast guard said we just can't take the inflatable trampling out past the break way anymore
I've reached the point to where my pre-gaming needs to be limited to pre-inning-ing
obviously my window is still shattered. they're pressure washing my condo today. i think i need a bloody mary.
Vaginas creep me out. I'm disgusted by the look of them. I wonder if this is what having an ugly baby is like: you have to take care of it and love it but it just hurts you on the inside to look at it.
I just threw up blood. Also i just remembered i got hit in the face with a 2 by 4.
I had to rename my dildo. I met a little kid who named his teddy bear the same name. It just felt wrong.
THERE IS A BABY THAT ISN'T MINE THAT'S GOING TO HEAR ME BEING SEXED!
You can't be mad... I'm letting you jerk off in my parents shower
Seriously. There were about 4 hours in which I swear my nose was not attached to my face.
The people above me are fucking to Miley Cyrus
Randomize
