Have u ever been so drunk that pissing urself felt like a better idea than walking to the bathroom? I entered those waters last night
just found out there is no tactful way to ask your girlfriend to wax her stache. no matter what a google search would have you believe.
our drinking schedule never changed, we just drank at work.
The tent neighbors already set us on fire w an errant roach. How do you think Bonnaroo's going?!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We've only been driving for two hours and I'm already down 3 vicodin...I'm not going to survive this family vacation.
Well we didn't hook up. Maybe from his girlfriend's point of view, but not mine.
Hes the only one i know who can talk to a girl for an entire hour abuot the science in starwars and still get laid.
It would be like bopping for an apple with my penis but never winning an actual prize. The only thing I would get from it would be the joy from taking part but then regretting it forever more
The night was going well until I found tufts of my hair in the freezer. Then I got nervous
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
He passed out again after sex. I've hidden all his clothes. There's no way he is sneaking out in the morning this time!
Can I come by? I want you to meet my squirrel
We should try to put a bagel on your penis
The impromptu 'dance party' was just three white dudes flailing arrhythmically in the kitchen in absolute silence. Stone cold sober.
But did u die
I found an onion in my purse
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