you were crying and the really sympathetic homeless man offered you a sip of his whiskey. who was i to stop you?
THEY JUST PLAYED KISS FROM A ROSE TONIGHT IS PERFECT
never. drinking. again.
lets not get ahead of ourselves.
You should be grateful to be my roommate. My booty calls always drive you places in the morning.
His bond is $50,000..margarita Monday might get cancelled
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
it was like lady and the tramp only with a jello shot on the pool table
Throwing up in his bed is not a step up in your relationship
All I want to do is shower, but there is a keg in there.
I kinda got drunk and threw my debit card into a bonfire so I don't have any money at the moment lol.
I'm currently sitting beside my brother who is taking a bath and feeding him nachos while he covers his genitals. If that's not sibling bonding then I don't know what is
I spent most of my night in the men's room eating popcorn on the garbage can conversing with strangers pissing
Bourbon is too strong for my cat, he does not want to drink it
So chicken strips and confidence do not you make you sober.
Those brownies did us in. I honestly blacked out completely.
What brownies? Ohmygod.
Randomize
