I miss him.. What the hell did I get myself in to? I guess it will get better with time.
No. Just liquor. Time's no good.
I gave my ex the dutch oven last night. How was your night?
I take no responsibility of who alcohol hooks up with using my body!
this girl walked outta his room as i was walkin in to scottys and i just say " time for the walk of shame baby! whoooo!". she ran away
when your friendship is based on dead babies and vodka there is a delicate balance. lesson learned. for what its worth, you are still my number one.
no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week.
I want to start this convo out by apologizing for the broken toaster.
Sooo just headbutted a stripper, meet you outside
Just sent my cousin to buy me a new bra cause mine is zip tied to a bar in the middle of nowhere Iowa
I'm trying to be all porn star and he's making it all The Notebook
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
He does impressions. Handy knowing you can get fucked by one guy and pretend a group of celebrities is running a train on you.
He also needs to focus on not being such a little bitch, but that's none of my business.
I FUCKED WHEELCHAIR DUDE
HE'S INTO WEIRD SHIT
GOOD KIND OF WEIRD SHIT
Getting a smaller wine glass hasn’t changed the amount I drink—it just means I get more steps each day. Cheers to health!
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