Betty ford says i'm here all night
i wish mother nature was an actual person cause i'd bitch slap her for sure
I am sleeping on the floor in your room so if you have sex in here just don't roll on me
You were in the corner dancing by yourself yelling "I look good", when really you looked ridiculous and drunk
Maybe I need a light up heart over my vagina like Christina aguilera to get the point across
Well i have to fuck at least one of your roommates this year to keep the tradition alive.
I cant feel my face. Like I dont even know if I have one. I wish I had a helmet
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
I had 5 long islands and 2 alien brain hemorrhages…I am entirely certain that the "power hour to finish the night" idea was just too much.
I didn't ask to see his penis, it was an ambush. Impressive though
The brazilian leg lock that the stripper put me in was definitely the highlight of the night
Like when I see him I look straight through his appearance and just envision a big walking penis.
What can I say, like your penis. The fact that I like the person attached to it helps too
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
We were peeing side by side on the riverbank together and I felt like nothing brings you closer than drunken riverbank urinating so I caught her a friendship frog to wipe with since we left the tp in the canoe.
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