I was just about to go down on her when she gave herself a "smell check" and said "no, not today".
there's a sledge hammer in the bottom of the swimming pool... so whatever happened last night was probably awesome
I just couldn't help myself when there was a FOUNTAIN OF SHOTS
No He hasn't done that since the time he came in his own eye
She's planning a December wedding, I'm planning on a June breakup.
Jus saw ur date getting a bj in the mcdonalds parking lot...u want anything?
She was rubbing her face on the carpet, she was high.
I don't think I'm allowed to have Burger King. What if i just chew for taste and not actually consume. Like a wine connoisseur for fast food
He said he was Greek American and that is why my legs slammed shut. During the World Cup there are only Americans.
My phone just put together a highlight reel of yesterday's dick pic session, set to music and everything
For the record you're a very classy lady and your love for and mastery of strap-ons is amazing. I would gladly marry you and father your offspring
But we made up last night and had unbelievably crazy sex tonight. I legit went blind for like 15mins from him choking me. It was awesome
I choose my mates solely based on size and ability. No cuddles. No sleep overs. Definitely no repeats.
you were grinding on the cop whispering for him to lend you his tazer.
He put on star wars porn, i thought it was hilarious last night but now i'm wondering why he has star wars porn
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