I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
He just said "Chunky" very loudly in his sleep.
we were boning in the bathroom when her boyfriend came upstairs. I wish i could remember what happened next more clearly, because it had to have been hilarious
They're pole dancing on a handicap sign post.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I pulled some girls weeve trying to pull the stop cord on the bus
I just found a piece of glass in my ear from Saturday.
I'll answer your question with a question: Are you gonna be too high?
Cause its not a drunken adventure unless someone ends up in a pool
I decided staying home, watching porn and masterbating was a much better choice than the gym. And I was right.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i've written a new chapter in the saga of unexpected dongs
Yea not today, I ending up taking a shit behind a tree last night.
Guess who just made out with Sloth from The Goonies!
Somewhere out there, on several phones belonging to strangers, exists a video of me rapping Baby Got Back on stage in four inch heels that I stole from the drag queen. Also I made out with the chick with the octopus tattoo.
You have the best birthdays
I'm sure nobody at Walmart was wondering why I was wearing a glittery tutu and needed $300 changed into small bills
If I die tonight, you and your brother can split my money evenly for college only.
all $38?
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