just tell him i said nine months
Why do bread and butter chips remind me of eating out your mom?
just spent $80 on an im sorry breakfast from mcdonalds for everyone sleeping in my apartment for being a drunkass and locking everyone out of the apartment at 2am.
walking around pouring bird seed on passed out guys in the quad.
Dude, you bit through my nipple. Give it a week, damn.
FRIENDSHIP PRAYER: May the crabs of 1,000 whores infest the crotch of the person who fucks up your day
I am "lost the control of my head" high right now.
You were dancing with his friend and you stopped to literally push the girl he was dancing with out of the way to make out with him
I'd rather blow Nickelback than be told he gave me gonorrhea. I'd even post it on Facebook for all of the world to like, share, and judge me.
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
He said he was Greek American and that is why my legs slammed shut. During the World Cup there are only Americans.
Sexual favors are the only currency recognized by the Republic of Greg
You woke up in between the boxspring and the matress in a random dorm room.
I'm all about clean living these days
You started your day with fried chicken and a bloody
... after you woke up in your own urine
I used to shoot steroids in my ass but for a totally different reason
Randomize
