If I were a woman I'd fill my water bra with liquor so that I could sip on it throughout the day.
now I regret adding my aunt on facebook. she remnded me today on my wall about the importance of checking my stools for blood since I have diaherria.
i have received so many congratulations texts this morning. sleeping with him really was a good decision.
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
Yeah but he's impersonating a gargoyle jumping off of everything. Including the walls.
It's sad that your definition of adulthood entails banging your boss after getting hammered at happy hour, and putting the tab on the company credit card.
well the night couldnt get much worse after she peed all over herself and the sidewalk.
CHEMICAL ENGINEER. God my mom would be so proud of me.
The sad thing is; I'm getting used to walking around feeling like I could hurl at any minute.
she has like 12 pairs of underwear people left at her house from the other night
I don't know which I need first...a shower or a confessional.
Your trash is full of condoms and yoohoos what a great life we live
No one with a hairstyle like that is allowed to insult anyone for anything
Im blaming it on six shots of Jack, loneliness and a chemical imbalance. That's the best I can think of...
So I justmade it back home and was greeted to a squirrel in my dorm... Last time I let my friends rent it out for a party.
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