He just left - my room smells like that cheese they put on nachos and cigarettes and beef
Yo quero taco bell
Then he told me I had the most beautiful looking vulva
today is like waiting for pizza day in elementary school, but with sex added
Correct me if I'm wrong but the photo album titles "cause I've been drankin" and "baby jessica" should not belong to the same person.
I can't make Walk of Shame Wednesdays a recurring theme.
I left him a voicemail saying i went through with the abortion and he texts me back one thing... the bbm "phew" face. really?
He's almost as awesome as vicodin.
Can i tell him you said that? Cuz i know that means a lot coming from you
Is "you left your socks here, please come get them" a good way of saying "come fuck me?"
Was that your vagina? Received a text pic from a number I didn't recognize. Shaved, so no hair color cues. But it looked like your lips.
my friend thinks you're hot & wants to fuck you ps i'm my friend
Note to self: do not ride giant beanbag chair down stairs.
I bought something for you today. You'll love it.
What is it? Drugs?
I'm getting married
To pizza
I'm pretty happy on the couch eating Popeyes and watching Cops so if I go over there you better have drugs left
gonna stay in tonight
and im a platypus. shotgun a beer and get your dick to this party. ive got some hot friends visiting
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