dude, my face is all kinds of fucked up right now. and don't even start with i told you so...
I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
I just pulled the condom that i lost on tues out of me at work ewwww!
I should have known there'd be issues when he included "beautiful soul" in our playlist
i knew he was a douchebag when his facebook activities were "ladeis," and "gettin crunk wit ladeis"
She has her iPod in her ears slippers and sweats on and is walking around the house up and down the stairs getting "exercise" she just stopped for a water break
Let's have a moment of silence for the guinea pig that drunk chick threw out our window.
Woke up laying in the kitchen floor with a cup in one hand and the beer tap in the other. Guess I just needed that one last beer.
Cookies. Watch out fir falling satellites.
Hahah fuuuck, bag pipers played around me while I threw up. Literally
Im pretty sure by the fifth subway ride after going in circles the four times prior, we all just accepted that we werent making the concert and should instead enjoy our magical weed and tequila laced journey.
i threw up in his garden in front of like five people smoking a joint. they let me have a hit after i was done so it was okay
He kept singing Happy Birthday to himself, yelling at the bouncers for not letting him in, and telling them his "father will hear of this." He was like a drunken Scottish Draco Malfoy.
I had to break it to her that she was not in fact behind the bushes when she peed on the church last night
I sent him a cookie cake that said "Congratulations you're not a father"
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