youre lurking in front of me
is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
Reason #84 I'm on my way to becoming a crazy cat lady: I called the police last night because I heard a noise and the cats were acting funny like they were trying to tell me something. The 3rd time the dispatcher repeated "the cats are acting funny?" I yelled and told her to have an officer ask the cats what happened.
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Totally just asked Dad if I needed to show the real estate guy my tits so he would let us buy the house. I've really got to work on that filtering thing.
They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.
quick, send me a pic of a fat chick eating ice cream in a bikini. no joke, no questions, just do it.
All I want is a camelback full of Jameson and the weather to be cool enough for me to wear rainbow spandex. Ugh. Pride problems.
I think I shall call his penis Gatsby. We talk about it all the time, but I never see it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Worst case scenario, I put a giant cork in your vagina so you don't give birth before my birthday
Just consider it? What else do you have going on today that could be as awesome as a day full of lord of the rings and sex?
Just high enough for therapy.
I think we need a list of things that are automatic NO's for dating a guy. Married, definitely a no now
you called me drunk last night to talk about summoning sex demons with magic WTF
i told him the only way i'd fuck him was if he saved me during the zombie apocolypse and took me to a tastefully decorated yet impenetrable hideout.
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