i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
He just left me a message saying he left the rest of the weed for me. Did i just get paid for sex? And if yes did i just get paid in drugs?
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
right before he passed out he said "take care of your tender spirit"
I felt kinda bad after screaming 'ITS MY BIRTHDAY TOO' while he was having a seizure in the front of the party bus.
Between the plague n the counterfeit drugs we brought back from mexico I'm not thinking too highly of their country right now. Screw mexican homeless men.
I don't know what you're talking about. I just drank beer out of my own bellybutton by doing a backbend and letting it run down my body.
I'm going to join a nudist colony to win $1000. There are no down-sides to this.
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
You know, I think when I have a lot of free time, thats when I pick up odd lovers. Maybe keeping busy is key to not using my vagina
Captain and coke. And it's not drinking alone cuz i have a dog
I came so hard I literally levitated off the top of his dick. Gravity was no match for that orgasm!
I just crop dusted the hot FedEx guy delivering my business cards...then asked him "Was that you?" How the fuck am I allowed to be an adult?
THAT'S MY GIRL
KICKING BUT AND GETTING PEOPLE INTOXICATED
Yes be both agreed it was the worst sex in the history of fornication, so I asked him to sign the condom wrapper so I could frame it as a reminder to NEVER sleep with him again
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