Tonight, I'm planning on being a bigger trainwreck than Britney Spears circa 2007.
and honestly a story about how you met your future husband that DOESN'T include the words "creeped him on facebook" is really not a story worth sharing
i just threw up in the porta potty. i am in no condition to be guarding anyone's life rite now.
we've had sex 4 times and he still refers to me as 'the chick in my chem class'
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
She's trying to feed the TV fried rice and screaming "FRIED RICE AND TEARS". Please bring me more booze.
My roommate has gone Christmas crazy. It looks like Jack Frost came all over my living room. Wanna come fuck me in the fake snow by the fireplace?
He's way too stoned. I took him to el bra and he's laying on the table, not sure what to do with him
I have meat and whiskey. will you bring condoms?
Is it too early in the day to ask a nipple-related question?
I can already feel the hangover I'll be having on New Year's Day. I don't know if I'm prepared for this.
The ride home was alright, we hooked up in the street next to his car after he smashed into the guard rail
I drunkenly texted ur dad last night telling him he raised great kids hahahahaha
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
Randomize