oh great. the only prospects for sex left for the night are douchebag in the ed hardy shirt & frodo-looking ass
fuck it... i'll be the lord of his rings
White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
So you started off by saying "no homo," but patting his crotch and saying his jeans fit him wonderfully may have overshadowed that.
I am one bad relationship away from having 30 cats.
You stole her cigarette screaming that you were going to stop the air cancer from getting everyone.
at least i was looking out for everybody
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
I got a lot accomplished today, and the day is still young! I built a fort, hot boxed a fort, had a tea party in a fort, and now realizing how high I am.
you can SEE the outline of a pad through her jeans. there is no way
after she rolled over and said 'i'm so glad you're like my gay best friend, love you' then left. did i just get friendzoned AFTER sex??
He walks in. We each have a tiki torch. We say, the tribe has spoken. We put his out and then stab him with it.
So apparently blacked out me judges a man based on what type of dinosaur he would be...
Halfway through the blowjob she stopped and said 'Wait I know this dick'.
I rubbed his back while he puked for an hour and then ended up getting laid when I tried to put him to bed, best puke and rally I've ever seen.
ps. i have two very important words to sum up my night
which are?
library sex.
did anyone ever come to your door asking about the blood on the floor?
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