question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
i just heard Winston Churchill in auto-tune. thank you nerds.
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
He told me he wants to eat me out all day while I lay in bed watching football. Seems like a solid foundation for a relationship to me.
I have a weapon and I'm not blacked out. Good as gold
Witnessing a crazy lady on the bus screaming about how romney is one of the four horsemen of the apocalypse.
All I can think of is a mama duck followed by her baby ducks, in brightly colored track shoes.
How high are you?
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
In other news, I just threw up my burrito and am currently on all fours literally crawling back to my bed
So I paid Bumble $10 to see who liked my profile for a month. Cheap, easy dick. It's all about the economics, yo.
Apparently I'm some kind of sexual camel.
btw...it's noon and i'm sitting here drinking wine and eating pixie stix. I really need to find something to do...
Seriously though, I walked in and he was holding my cat in the air singing "the circle of life"...
fucked one of the teachers, librarian job's going great
Randomize
