Do you realize that Last night you pissed in my closet and then walked to the bathroom to wash your hands?
I cut you off after you tried to do a shot out of a neti pot, down your nose.
explains the nose bleeds.
My roommate has every episode of Full House. I'm going to fail my midterm tomorrow.
I just got a Community College debit card in the mail. My failure has been materialized.
OMG. if college stays like this, theres no way i wont be pregnant by first semester
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
Its like "fucckkkkk yooouuuuuu" is echoing up my esophagus
tequila?
yep
I'd love to sympathize with you but I'm drunk in a mansion
Why are there chunks of your hair in everyones pocket?
I decided to mark my territory.
Kyle's mobile fuck service..... Kinda has a nice ring to it don't you think??
Last night I dressed up as a cowgirl and walked into McDonald's. I bought 20 mcribs. There's pictures
Watching a bear prancing around in a tiara is worth a loss of bar time.
Drake has all the answers
I just said "you do you" to my penis.
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
Randomize
