Straightened my pubes. My dick looks like John Lennon fucked Gonzo.
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
She just sat there, all alone, with a bottle of booze. And the dog. He even looked like he didn't wanna be there with her.
She's walking around topless with a bottle of red wine, crying and singing showtune ballads. This is actually an improvement.
You know when the three of us hug it out in the alcohol isle in walmart it's gonna be fun.
I woke him up with a blow job and he started sing "oh the USAAAA. IT'S GOING TO BE S BEAUTIFUL DAYYYYY"
that's where you went wrong. never assume I'm adult enough to do something on my own.
I think I'm a wingman for every guy who bangs a girl I scarred in highschool.
I bought new panties to console myself ... you know, because I am going to lose my ovaries. Well, if I don't die of a heart attack first. But at least when the EMS folks find me, I'll be finely dressed from the waist down.
the second she challenged me to mario kart drinking game i knew i was in love
I need you there. I need someone to glance at when other people inevitably annoy me.
I'M GOING TO FUCK AN ENTIRE ORCHESTRA AND NOTHING CAN STOP ME
The band club does not count as an orchestra
I WANT BLOOD. HERS. I WILL DYE A FABULOUS PAIR OF SUEDE PUMPS RED WITH HER BLOOD.
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
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