i just told my boss to make it rain at camelot later...what is wrong with me?
Blackberries need to come with a feature that disables texting to certain numbers after 2am based on content. liek disabling texting to 'dad' containng the words 'lets try to find more blow.'
Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
Ryan just walked out of his frat house with a case of beer, a 6 dollar bottle of vodka, and a pillow. He's good to go.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm 6 minutes and 3 drinks deep before she gets here. she's do-able for a wednesday night, but i still need to mentally prepare, ya know?
Climbing onto the roof in a dress and high heeled boots was probably not the best idea, especially after all that Bacardi.
It's the building I live in, they were lucky I was wearing clothes at all
Heard you had a bad day. I have vodka, chocolate and my dick here ready to put a smile back on your face.
HE FINALLY TEXT ME AND CALLED ME BY MY TWITTER NAME STAND BY FOR THE WEDDING INVITE, BRIDESMAID
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Being on probation is a nice change of pace. It's refreshing to wake up and know what I did last night.
How early is too early to start drinking when studying for the bar?
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
Thank you for coming with me today. I find it appropriate that we celebrated my negative pregnancy test with slurpees and donuts.
No no no, I want to share him with you. Think of it as me sharing a piece of delicious pie with you. He was THAT GOOD.
You spent twenty minutes waxing poetic about her ass and her thighs
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