I just googled the nutrition facts for a mcgriddle and yet I still want to go to mcdonalds
May or may not have just drunkenly opened my christmas presents. Greatly disappointed. Might break up sooner.
but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
I wish straight boys touched me the way gay boys do.
It was my penance. God came down to me in the form of an angel and said, "you must atone for your sins, by puking in your mouth at church right before communion"
It's official, there's a sex tape of me floating around some high school
I just made the answer to all my security questions "fuck you" with various levels of ! marks. I may regret this in the morning.
her 18 year old son fed me pieces of a french roll like a pigeon, as I lay on the floor of the bathroom crying.
My mom just made me promise her that i'll care about the next guy I sleep with
I'm not even mad. I was just trying to get a boner, you're the one that had to see that
Judging by the progress I've made since I woke up (none) I'm thinking this hangover may keep me in bed.
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
I just got called the stable friend. This makes me super uncomfortable
CUM CAME OUT OF MY NOSE. MY SINUSES ARE ENTIRELY FUCKED UP NOW BC OF THE CUM TRAVELING IN PLACES IT SHOULD NOT HAVE.
I mean seriously, she can have his dick anytime and im over here salivating like a thirsty bitch.
Randomize