Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
we marched down beaver avenue with lit tiki torches humming the olympics opening song.
Please know that I fully expect you to help me steal a bed if I have a bad breakup.
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
You looked like my 4th grade science fair volcano project when you burped. Told you chugging a 40 would be awesome.
my favorite homeless guy just told me I drive like Batman, achievement unlocked
I totally accidentally said "we don't go around hammering girls in the rear" in front of 132 5th graders today.
I'm gonna do some tripping... In the direction of balls
I stole something. Which direction out are you guys gonna go
I woke up and found cookies in my purse. It's a 12/12/12 miracle.
I've grown it out to 70s proportions. I'm calling it my chastity pelt.
I feel like I put a fire out with my hand but idk if that was a dream or not
You wanna come over?
Too high to be booty called. My cereal is growing hair.
She asked what the dent on the hood of my car was from..i think she knows we had sex up there
He's such a jerk. If only his penis was attached to someone else
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