Can I come over?
Can't... I'm at class right now.
No your not
I'm outside by your car.
I am in a vortex of obligation.
I shampoo & condition my pubes, sometimes i wish my face was closer so i could rub against it cause it feels like plush
If there was chocolate on Regis Philban's dick, I would totally lick it off. That's how desperate I am for some right now.
drinking warm bud heavies i found in the garage and googling how to tell the gosselin kids apart.
9 beers later and she still looks like Gary Busey.
there's got to be a less slutty way to tell him the baby isn't his
Dear God. I kissed a man tonight who was born in 1936.
Just made a photo collage of the girls I've hooked up with this summer. I'm patting myself on my back right now
He said he wanted to have butt sex with me and curl up with me after and just be near me. Then he passed out.
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
I think my Halloween costume this year will be made entirely of pillows and I'll be Marshmellow girl or Kirby. That way I'm comfortable, warm, and if I fall over drunk I'm safe.
I didnt finish. My brain kept playing the duck tales theme thru the entire blow job
What happened last night and why am I partially covered in queso?
We could probably bang our way to enlightenment. However acid helps.
Randomize
